Request: Parenting help

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OK, I need a little advice from the blogosphere. Andrew (9) came home and told the following joke that he learned at camp today. I need to figure out a response.

so, a duck walks into a courtroom.
judge: "what's your name and why are you here?"
duck: "My name is quack, and i was sent here for blowing bubbles in the pond."
The judge shakes his head and sends him away.

another duck walks into the courtroom.
judge: "what's your name and why are you here?"
duck: "My name is quack quack quack, and i was sent here for blowing bubbles in the pond."
the judge shakes his head and sends him away too.

a third duck walks into the courtoom.
judge: "let me guess. your name is quack quack quack and you were sent here for blowing bubbles in the pond."
duck: "no, my name is bubbles, and i was sent here for blowing quack and quack quack in the pond."

Andrew told the joke, but he didn't get it and asked us what it meant. I'm pretty sure Michelle's response of running away while holding her napkin over her face and then laughing out loud for minutes in the bedroom was not the right one.


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Lloyd Reply

Isn't this one of those issues you can defer to your better half? Send him to his mother for an answer :-P

Tony Reply

Michelle is my better half. You can see from her reaction that maybe this isn't one those issues.

chooky Reply

You've clearly got two choices. Jump in or obfuscation. There's no toe dipping here. I say you jump in. This stuff starts at age 9 now huh? Wonderful.

Craig Reply

Tell him you don't know, and give him a different joke that he'll understand:

A duck walks into a bar, turns to the bartender and says, "Got any grapes?" The bartender says, "Nope, sorry. We're a bar - no grapes."

The next day, the same duck walks into the same bar and says, "Got any grapes?" The bartender says, "No, like I told you yesterday, no grapes."

On the third day, the duck comes in and says, "Got any grapes?" The bartender is stunned and shouts, "No! We don't have any grapes! And if you come in tomorrow and ask for grapes, I'm gonna nail your beak to the bar! Get outta here!!"

The next day, the duck walks in, looks at the bartender and says, "Got any nails?" The bartender looks confused, but answers, "No... we don't have any nails."

The duck replies, "Good. Got any grapes?"

Tony Reply

LOL! Good joke and good tip. I should have know to ask you, Craig.

brett Reply

Believe it or not, its a great way to bond with the kid by sitting down as an adult and calmly explaining the meaning of the joke to him.
Think about it this way:
Do you want to explain it to him, or do you want his friends to explain it to him.
I'm sure he already knows the birds and the bees.

Andrew Reply

dad! you got the joke wrong! it's just "no. my name is bubbles." and that's it!

Cy Reply

Great grapes joke, I would have handled it in much the same way when my kids were only 9 years old but ut really depends on the maturity of the child and his/her environment on a day to day basis.

Is he/she hanging out with kids who tell these kinds of jokes on a regular basis? Are those kids being raised by irresponsible adults who expose them to sexual behavior through their own behavior, shows, movies, etc. One thing you don't want to happen is having someone say to your child, come over here and I will show you.

I have three great kids, young adults now and I did try and keep the innocence in their childhood for as long as possible. You only get to be a kid once! When a situation similar arose, I also checked out the environs of the other child. If not good, I told my child they were only allowed to hang out with that other child ONLY IF they were in our home and I or my spouse was home to supervise. There was rarely much of a protest, and even if there was that WAS THE LAW in the house. The best thing of it all, was how many of those kids came to see us as parent figures in their lives and several wrote of it in graduation notes, some even called us Mom and Dad. My advice: always have something to eat & drink on hand and games (like Monopoly, Life, decent video games, etc.)and you will never have any problem keeping the kids at your house. This doesn't have to be expensive either (Bread peanut butter, jelly, carrot sticks, homemade cupcakes, cookies,lemonade mix should be staples and games can be picked up cheap at garage sales and are great Christmas/Birthday presents.) Its great to know who you're kids friends are and what they are doing and having them at home you can keep them all out of trouble. You can be a great influence just by providing a wholesome atmosphere on a day to day basis.

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