This morning the Andrew (7) and Michael (4) jumped into bed and each kissed me on the cheek to wake me up. "Wow, it's great to be a dad!" I thought.

Andrew: "Haha, I licked you."
Michael: "Haha, I wiped boogers on you."

Kill me now. They're teaming up against me already. It's like the scene in Jurassic Park where the velociraptors show pack hunting intelligence. Scary.